Professor Slow Jerk and his Amazing Study Guide

This week, we will look at a few things you should know in the week that is College Football.

Game of the week – UGA/Bama


I’m looking into the future.  This is the amount of Natural Light that Matthew Stafford will have to drink after getting beaten by the Fighting Sabans.  I’ll say this – he’s a better keg holder than a passer.  And at least with the keg in his hands he can’t spoon a fellow Dawg.  As for Knowshon – I’m glad he’s putting his leaping abilities to good use.

More after the jump:

I DRIVE A DODGE STRATUS!*MKcIYEZL6Afncll1PlcItfg4UC8_/willFerrell.jpg

USC is the number 1 team in the land.  They are traveling for a Thursday night game (Thursday?) to Corvallis, where they haven’t fared all that well recently.  Trap game?  Maybe.  Oregon State is BAD so far.  Then again, who has USC beaten?  Virginia is their best win.  They also beat some cupcake from the Big 10.  This should be a game USC rolls – but they are probably the least tested team in the top 4-5 right now – maybe OU.  This game will tell us if they are really the number 1 team in the land.  Would I be shocked if USC lost?  To quote honorary STQ USC coach Will Ferrell, “You wouldn’t hire a clown to fix a leak in the John. So why do you let these hooligans tear down the biz?” – exactly.

Care to escort me to the box social, madame?

Ok – JoePa is old.  His team has played the equivalent of an intramural flag football schedule.  But, there is life for the old man – he is in the Big 10.  Ohio State?  Lamer than McCain suspending a presidential campaign.  Wisconsin?  As boring as listening to any actor talk about their “craft.”  That leaves… Penn State.  Look for JoePa to put on his best salt-and-pepper suit and show up at the courting process known as the BCS.  I also expect for him to say something inappropriate along the way.

Bob Stoops’ Worst Nightmare

Uh oh, OU fans.  Boise State has BCS dreams.  Here’s my question – why is there a bowl game played on the blue tundra in Boise – and why is Boise State eligible for that bowl?  Strange, strange stuff.  ECU played itself out of BCS spoiler.  Utah and BYU are right there – but Boise has the experience.  A 1-loss OU (yes, they will lose) will probably end up facing one of these teams again.  I’m sure the Stoopsmeister would prefer to not play a mid-major.  And yes, I’m counting WVU as a mid major last year.

The key thing to remember this week is that chalk will prevail.  I see 1, maybe 2 upsets in the top 25, but that’s it.  It will also be interesting to see what happens in the polls with so many teams on bye.  Keep your eye on the OU/TCU game.  Sure, OU is dominant, but TCU has come into Norman and stolen one not long ago.  How OU reacts to this game could propel their NC and Bradford’s Heisman hopes.

That’s all for today.  One last thought – the UGA/’Bama game reminds me a lot like versus

Well, except that ‘Bama and UGA are vastly overrated and both Biggie and Tupac were amazing.

Slow Jerk – until next time.


One Response

  1. Superb Content, Top Notch, and User Friendly are the best way to describe this post, reading this motivates me.

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