Fail!

Bo Pelini,  your team was in great shape to steal the game from VaTech last night, a pretty remarkable accomplishment, given the way your listless Cornhusker squad slept its way through the first half. Your defense, which had left open lane after lane all night long finally came up big and forced a Hokie punt, which Nate “Great White Hope” Swift returned for a touchdown. Down just 5 points, momentum finally appeared to be on your side. Then, when it mattered most, your team exhibited a remarkable lack of discipline, highlighted, of course, by your complete overreaction to what was a good and proper personal foul call by the official. Way to take the game away from your players, pal. For that, you wear the dunce cap this week, as demonstrated by this hastily slapped together Photoshop image.

STQ Week 5 Pop Quiz

Seriously, doesn’t that pretty much sum up Thursday night’s events?

Anyway, on to this week’s Pop quiz after the jump.

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This Guy Could have Tackled Jacquizz

Brian Cushing?  Ray Maualuga?  Pssssh.  This guy would lead USC in tackles.

I expect this was about the level of seriousness at the Trojan practices this week.  Congrats, Beavers!

Pop Quiz Thursday – Trojans and Beavers Edition

Trojans and Beavers
On one hand you have a lethal batch of Trojans — USC that is. On the other hand, some wounded Beavers — Oregon State that is — that are used to taking a pounding. Seems like a mismatch. That’s what it seemed like two years ago, too, when USC traveled to Corvallis, Ore. Instead, Oregon State shocked the world. Will we have another shocker, only our experts know and they’ll break it down after the jump.

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Honors Courses

I have to be honest, picking five games this week wasn’t an easy task. When my beloved Tigers take a one-week hiatus, I sort of view it as vacation time. I never step too far away, but look at the match-ups this week. Hardly any of them are inspiring. Alabama/UGA is probably the only premium game this week. That’s sad. It’s ok to experience a lull right about now, though, because come next week, pretty much everyone will be in conference play, and that’s when things get interesting. I can’t wait to dig into the wonderful juiciness that will be the Honors Courses next week. For now, this will have to do. Enjoy.

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Professor Slow Jerk and his Amazing Study Guide

This week, we will look at a few things you should know in the week that is College Football.

Game of the week – UGA/Bama

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I’m looking into the future.  This is the amount of Natural Light that Matthew Stafford will have to drink after getting beaten by the Fighting Sabans.  I’ll say this – he’s a better keg holder than a passer.  And at least with the keg in his hands he can’t spoon a fellow Dawg.  As for Knowshon – I’m glad he’s putting his leaping abilities to good use.

More after the jump:

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Week 4 STQ Dean’s List and Paddle Line

Top Heavy – and we’re not talking about Tebow’s girlfriend

Everybody knows the SEC and Big 12 are very good conferences, head-and-shoulders above the likes of the ACC and Big East, comfortably better than the Pac-10 and Big MAC (that’s new, official, STQ terminology for the Big Ten. Thanks, Big Televen moniker – you’ve served us well). But this good? If college football was a well-endowed female, and said well-endowed female was the type of woman who named her breasts, the right one would be called “SEC” and the left one would be “Big 12.”

Don’t miss our weekly ranking of the 21 best teams and seven worst things in college football this week – complete with comments about each from our four resident gurus-in-their-own-minds. Continue reading